Dear Jenny,

Zumba is the only real form of exercise you get in a week, so there is no negotiating. You are going, goddammit.

Love,
Jenny

P.S. Tracy was the wrong person to whine to.

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Solo started it

Solo has figured out that touching the phone makes it stop buzzing, so in the morning when she comes to cuddle with me, she starts pawing at my phone. This morning she opened the blog app. Perhaps she has some things to say too.

My early morning offering is this:

I can't wait to move to another city so I can go to a ballgame.

Also:

How many times did I refer to Chris and I as a collective unit? Wasn't it clear that I was proud of him? Supportive? Why was he unable to do those things in return? That's some bullshit. Sometimes it's all I can do to restrain myself from hoping he gets everything he deserves, sometimes I have auto-empathy. Recently it occurred to me that my auto-empathy has a lot more to do with me than him. Even hoping for karma feels vindictive. It's already happening, though. He told me this has been the unluckiest year ever.

That's right- it's just arbitrary bad luck, nothing to do with bad decisions. I tried not to smirk.

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Because blood counts more than behavior

I was just making pancakes and broccoli for dinner (Hey now, single people can eat what they want.) when a drip of batter became a tiny pancake. "Tiny pancake!" I exclaimed as I carefully flipped it over. Instantly, I wished for Ant. He would be equally concerned about it and we would say "tiny pancake" to each other in silly voices an unnecessary number of times. He would put it on a plate with a tiny pat of butter and syrup and eat it with a knife and fork. Did I ever tell you that he shared my bizarre love of drinking out of small vases? In this divorce, how come I didn't get Ant? He's clearly my kid.

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Garbage troll

Now, I've learned the hard way over the years that the trash can has got to be secured, but the bag of recycle paper? Ah yes, there was an empty box of dog biscuits inside. She may need to be on a diet, but you see what I'm working with here? Good grief.

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Bad, Bad Leroy Brown Dog's Owner

Just tried to relieve my neighbor of Leroy. Found him out again, roaming the neighborhood. I sat in the shady grass and petted him for a long time before taking him home. He is covered in mats and feels a little bony. I clearly can't tell what a healthy weight is for a dog, but I thought maybe he's old: he's got a couple bumps and his hips feel delicate. He loved the attention and just turned and turned his body to be petted.

Why the fuck would you just let your dog out alone? I won't even do that with Riley- the dog who stayed on the sidewalk while trying to run away from a huge thunderstorm, scared out of her mind. He's not escaping- you let him do this because you don't want to go with him. He could easily get hit, he's not fixed, and you're not picking up his poop, you asshole.

I thought it would be an easy sell and was already thinking of how soon I could schedule a vet visit, but my shitty, neglectful neighbor declined. I asked if she wanted him and did not point out that it doesn't look that way. I said he needs exercise and I know she's busy. She didn't seem mad but a little surprised, so I told her to let me know if she changes her mind. I know he'd be adopted quick from a shelter (being such a sweetie), but even if I found him a home or he stayed with me, he'd be a happier, well-cared for, and safer (and neutered) dog. Keep your fingers crossed that she changes her mind before I start handing out "Free Leroy" t-shirts. Of course, if I keep catching him outside alone, she may not have a choice.

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Signs

So far, this calendar of inspirational quotes has been quite relevant and helpful.

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Visual strain

It also has "hidden images," but this is the only one I could find. Can you see it? It's Big Ben.

It says

As you ponder this scene of modes of talk, look for London's famous clock.

So maybe it is only in here once and they're just saying that all the Impossibles have hidden images. Whatever, I found it. Success! Now, back to the thrift store it goes.

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The Puzzler

Finally stopped whining last night and finished my latest puzzle. This one is from a series called Impossibles; perhaps you remember the goldfish attempt? Impossibles have no border and five extra pieces. This one at least seemed more possible because there are different kinds of phones and there are lines and words. It was a good level of difficult. Notice how you haven't seen the red puzzle lately? It's in my big puzzle keeper portfolio, and it may stay there.

Jennyway, I finished this one last night while listening to music. The evening ended nicely.

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