IntroverSHHHHHion

6:45 am on a Saturday. I'm up from a slight low, but the cat would have woken me up anyway. I fed the girls and took Riley out, and now Riley is rolling her treat ball around the living room. Putting her kibble in that was the one of the best ideas I ever stole off the internet.

I have a boring weekend ahead now that I am unattached again, but I am looking forward to having a chance to rest and catch up. I'll figure out what kind of trouble I can get into later- for now, I just want some quiet.

The librarian from the Sacramento VA is coming to spend next week training me- this is the second and final visit, as he retires in December. I have to make sure I am really focused for that.

Also, I had a very important realization that I am lacking in good work shirts, so I'll be out at our favorite tagline stores, armed with coupons.

It won't be like this every weekend, but it's good to have just one.

Eventually trainable

I have lived here for almost two years, and I just now figured out how to thwart the dryer. Do you ever wonder how you make it out the door in the morning? Do you ever wonder how I make it out the door in the morning?

So I heard or read somewhere recently that you should not make decisions based on your emotions, and I was dumbfounded, because that implies that there is another way to make decisions! I... what?

But of course, the reason that information makes sense to me (now) is that I wear those feelings so thoroughly and immediately. It's a little alarming. Do you have anything I can take responsibility for- anything you'd like me to feel guilty about? It's a good thing I wasn't raised Catholic. Jesus.

Sparkles

I had most of a blog written earlier when I left the page to look for a picture and the whole damn thing disappeared. That was not how the old phone worked, gd. But last night I heard a woman say that God answers her in three ways: yes, no, and if you insist. I'm going to take notes from that and not attempt to rewrite that blog as was (because I could), and instead incorporate my new findings.

I was telling you that I felt like a deservedly unloved asshole because I broke it off with someone I did not feel was right for me. Well, not because of that. I felt like an asshole for the way I did it and... well, just the fact that I caused hurt by doing it at all. That sucks, and I have been feeling sick and awful for three days. I really, really do not like that part. And maybe I was not clear enough and maybe I did not say it often enough, but I DID try to communicate my concerns. I tried several times and with that realization, I am suddenly feeling much less defensive and apologetic about my decision.

I was being told that I was not communicating, but I was. Verbally. And like I said, maybe not to the best of my abilities, but it was the best I could do in that particular situation.

If this isn't me, I don't know what is. Let me skulk around, feeling like a bad dog in my asshole hat, wearing that and any other guilt and shame I can put on until I finally notice that I am not the only culprit. And hey, I might have had good reason to feel alarmed or reluctant. And that doesn't make me or him into a bad person, because we are not. Not even close. We're just not it.

So Jennyway

I put The Red Menace back in the box. I admit defeat.

This one came from the thrift store (of course), but in a Ziploc bag! No box! And it's a map puzzle!!! Hooray!

Also, I forgot to tell you that there were zebras.

Seriously, ostriches.

Look at them! Doesn't seem possible, does it.

Ostriches

I got a nice picture of one of the ostrich races. They also raced zebras and had children chase emus and chickens. The chicken race took WAY more time than any other race, even though they started maybe fifteen feet from the finish line. Hysterical.

Just for Tracy

I'm not sure if he's supposed to be inspiring drivers to slow down through Virginia City or just creep them out, but he succeeds at both.

Camels

Went to the camel races yesterday with Sparky. It was pretty hot and my shoulders got cooked again, even though we sprayed me in what must be some very old 50 spf sunscreen. I have never been to the camel races before- it was very silly and lots of fun. I got to skritch one camel's neck, and from the way he or she was stretching out their neck and almost yawning, they were either about to tap their leg or bite my fingers off. There was no attempt to whip their head towards me, so I hope it was good. The ostriches were so neat. I loved watching them.