It's already past 9:00! I don't think I'm going to do any editing today, mostly because I want to be asleep soon. I keep getting lots of praise and encouragement from my reviewer, so I am trying to take confidence from that and not be a perfectionist about it. What's hard is learning as I go- so I see things or change my mind regarding how something should be written, and I have no idea which questions I have already published a different way. But those things can be fixed later.
I realized today that each time I have take the DiSC assessment, I get a different secondary trait. My primary is always a D, which is dominance, but I'm all over the place on the secondary, which I giggle at because that's kind of totally me. I'll drive, but I have no idea where we're going.
I had my tennis drill tonight and it felt very good to be back out there. We're getting the Joint Commission visit at work, and today we caught wind that they were coming to our site, so that lit a fire under our asses. We all felt we were good, but kept finding things to fix. These are things like: no cardboard boxes are allowed on the floor. This is a cardboard-gets-wet-and-things-start-living-in-it kind of problem, not a we're-just-creating-things-to-hassle-you-about problem.
I used that motivation to get my desk under control and now it looks all pretty. That felt pretty good. I also found out that I already did one of those big awful euuurrgghhh things on my work to do list and handed it to the next person involved and found out today that it's well on its way! I was about to start it again because I had almost no memory of doing it. Sheesh.
So that felt good, and tennis felt good. My blood sugar was at 98 about halfway through, so I ate some straight sugar and made it through the intense part fine. It's hard to get enough straight sugar in in the first place, and then you need to wait before eating any complex carbs or protein to let your sugar come up while you're doing an intense activity. I ate dinner right afterwards, but crashed again at the tail end of grocery shopping. Apparently, exercise changes how much insulin you need, which means you could be a calculus wizard, and still be soundly defeated by diabetes math. HA! Now, THAT'S a college level math class!
I wore my new exercise capris with the pocket today. I may have purchased one size too large. I am not thrilled about trying other ones and outlining the contours even more, but nobody pointed and laughed, so there's that.
Mini is staring wide-eyed at my shirt, which makes me paranoid that something's crawling on me or she's just wigging out and is about to attack me anyway.
I dragged in all my groceries in one trip while still recuperating from the low, and with bags falling out of my grip. It was ridiculous. I am ridiculous.
Now I need to go get Riley out and answer these boys back about scheduling time to meet them this weekend. My hopes aren't super high, but they all seem genuine, and the plans are things I enjoy anyway, so it'll be good regardless.
Super busy, super tired, super happy.
Thursday, March 17, 2016
Monday, March 14, 2016
But at least I made dinner
Have I mentioned how much I hate sharing one washer and dryer with... ten people?
Arrrrghhhhhh... but ok, it doesn't create problems TOO often. Someday my Whirlpool will come.
Actually, I just met with a financial adviser last week and got some confirmation, some good ideas, and yet another suggestion to get a second job. He makes a solid point, but I am away too much as is. I'm pushing for the alternate schedule, but now I have to write a justification. If I could just push the more pressing issues aside...
Yes, send the waahmbulance. I'm still feeling sick and tomorrow I have the next quarter of fillings to go, which will make that side ridiculously sensitive too and then I don't know how I'll eat. I've already taken the water pitcher out of the fridge, because nerve pain first thing in the morning is more than I can bear. I will interrogate the dentist tomorrow, but I'm sure the answer is "Yep!"
I'm almost finished with the 1500 piece puzzle and over 300 editing questions, and it's probably not the best time for reflection. I always feel pulled back to do more editing, not because it's fun- it's really not- but because I constantly feel obligated. I want the things that can come from this, so I'm trying to put in some time every day, and that gives me the sense of what it must be like to work from home.
I hope I sound as whiny as I feel.
So now I have to draw on some wise words and calm myself down, because cigarettes are off limits, and Nyquil and beer don't mix.
1) Stop looking at everything. Keep your head down, toil away, and know you're moving, even if it doesn't feel like it.
2) Acknowledge what's good. Paid off the small student loan, found cheaper and better insurance, about to consolidate the big student loan. You've done well, and the financial adviser could only suggest cutting out Netflix!
3) If you made the mess, you can clean it up. I'll give that one a grudging nod.
I was just telling Tracy earlier about how I keep using my wishes to get better, and just realized that what that means is opportunities to get better, and isn't that horrifying?
I got Sarah some colored pencils, Mom. You were right. That's why I called you. :)
I'm halfway through the Lord of the Rings trilogy on audiobook, and you know I cannot leave a puzzle alone until it's finished, so that's where I spent the weekend. Oh, that's probably at least half of it- I felt way too awful to do anything except nap and work on the puzzle for most of the weekend. Will I ever be able to enjoy doing a puzzle without feeling like I should be doing something else? Or does that make it enjoyable? No, I will probably always feel like I could be accomplishing something else, and that's very true, but I really like doing puzzles, so fuck that.
I also learned this weekend that I can be pretty bitchy when I'm sick. I had a couple moments where I had to excuse myself from responding because it wasn't going to be nice.
Alright, so I will try to do some laundry tomorrow. Tonight, editing. Pet the dog. Listen to a good story. Get some more rest, because I clearly need it.
Arrrrghhhhhh... but ok, it doesn't create problems TOO often. Someday my Whirlpool will come.
Actually, I just met with a financial adviser last week and got some confirmation, some good ideas, and yet another suggestion to get a second job. He makes a solid point, but I am away too much as is. I'm pushing for the alternate schedule, but now I have to write a justification. If I could just push the more pressing issues aside...
Yes, send the waahmbulance. I'm still feeling sick and tomorrow I have the next quarter of fillings to go, which will make that side ridiculously sensitive too and then I don't know how I'll eat. I've already taken the water pitcher out of the fridge, because nerve pain first thing in the morning is more than I can bear. I will interrogate the dentist tomorrow, but I'm sure the answer is "Yep!"
I'm almost finished with the 1500 piece puzzle and over 300 editing questions, and it's probably not the best time for reflection. I always feel pulled back to do more editing, not because it's fun- it's really not- but because I constantly feel obligated. I want the things that can come from this, so I'm trying to put in some time every day, and that gives me the sense of what it must be like to work from home.
I hope I sound as whiny as I feel.
So now I have to draw on some wise words and calm myself down, because cigarettes are off limits, and Nyquil and beer don't mix.
1) Stop looking at everything. Keep your head down, toil away, and know you're moving, even if it doesn't feel like it.
2) Acknowledge what's good. Paid off the small student loan, found cheaper and better insurance, about to consolidate the big student loan. You've done well, and the financial adviser could only suggest cutting out Netflix!
3) If you made the mess, you can clean it up. I'll give that one a grudging nod.
I was just telling Tracy earlier about how I keep using my wishes to get better, and just realized that what that means is opportunities to get better, and isn't that horrifying?
I got Sarah some colored pencils, Mom. You were right. That's why I called you. :)
I'm halfway through the Lord of the Rings trilogy on audiobook, and you know I cannot leave a puzzle alone until it's finished, so that's where I spent the weekend. Oh, that's probably at least half of it- I felt way too awful to do anything except nap and work on the puzzle for most of the weekend. Will I ever be able to enjoy doing a puzzle without feeling like I should be doing something else? Or does that make it enjoyable? No, I will probably always feel like I could be accomplishing something else, and that's very true, but I really like doing puzzles, so fuck that.
I also learned this weekend that I can be pretty bitchy when I'm sick. I had a couple moments where I had to excuse myself from responding because it wasn't going to be nice.
Alright, so I will try to do some laundry tomorrow. Tonight, editing. Pet the dog. Listen to a good story. Get some more rest, because I clearly need it.
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