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Quick- crack a beer so you won't go out for dinner!

Whew... that was close. There were a couple of Red Robin gift certificates as prizes, and I sat there at dinnertime, not winning one, thinking, "Mmmm, Red Robin..." Well, crisis averted. I am heating up some turkey meatballs in spaghetti sauce for my garlic bread meatball sub. Whatever, it's less carbs than having pasta and bread. And by the way, Red Robin, who the hell thought a "bottomless basket of fries" was a good idea? But oh man, there is little I love more than going out to dinner.

I didn't win a damn thing, and neither did anyone at my table. Of course, we were rationing our bingo cards. The winners tended to have piles of used cards (and prizes) on their tables. What they paid in donations may very well have negated the worth of what they won, with the exception of the blackout bingo prizes. As Tee put it, the games got very tense towards the end. I put two cards on a flat screen TV and let her daughter mark one for me. Tee and her husband were kind hawks, making sure none of my numbers were missed. It was a fun kind of tension, and I think next year I will recruit some friends and involve alcohol and dinner.

So yes, I went to bingo. It was a fundraiser, if I haven't told you, for the Feline Rescue of Northern Nevada. That was my social activity for the weekend. I declined other offers (Hey! I had other offers!) and limited myself to one, because I was so tired from this last week. I am consoling myself with the idea that I have evenings open all week, so hopefully I will have the energy to do something besides lie on the couch watching Breaking Bad. (I cannot believe he just let Jane DIE! Ugh!)

I got my apartment half cleaned, so that's something, huh? Got my laundry done and... well, I think that's about it, but we are no longer working on perfection over here. We're in a "Whatever Works" phase- emphasis on the whatever. Today I went searching for a dog bowl and a birdfeeder, and found a fake key with a little knife tucked inside. This is where it shows up in the story and you forget about it until later on when it conveniently shows up and saves the day. It may seem irrelevant now, but I hate it when writers wait until they need it to explain how they got it, so I'm telling you now because it's sure to show up again at some point when I'm stuck in some dire situation. I don't want it to seem like I only came up with it then- I want you to believe that I knew where I was going from the start.

It's been a mellow Sunday. Earlier, someone called them Melancholy Sundays, and that feels appropriate. They often seem bittersweet with the "Dammit, tomorrow's Monday..." It's as if it's not worth having any fun at all. I spend my time these days feeling lonely, but right now I feel like it's an ok kind of lonely, like it'll be less lonely soon and I should just enjoy the time I have to myself.

Did I tell you that I lost four volunteers last week? Only one was an actual blaming me situation, and that one didn't really have that much to do with me, I think. The rest were just coincidental, but someone is going to be upset when she returns from vacation. I had my panicked/feeling horrible moments, and have moved forward from that, but I will need to remember that she will likely be quite alarmed to hear the news. Other than that, things at work will be fine. It feels so big- so much to do, so much to learn, so much to track, so much to promote and manage, but I am keeping my myself optimistic and pleased that I have such gentle chaos that keeps my work days flying by. That's much better than my daily countdown with my coworker: "Only 7 hours and 24 minutes to go!"

On a brighter note, I got flirted with... by someone my age! That is a feat, considering that I normally attract old guys. He was tall and kind of cute, although I could barely see him over the glare from his wedding ring. Boooooo. Gross, dude.

Due to stupid fucking circumstances and me being so quick to wear responsibilities that aren't really mine, I have Jasmine with me and may keep her indefinitely. Some of you will applaud that; some of you will think I'm insane. For now, it's fine. I took her to my trainer for an assessment, and I'm putting her in a class at the end of April. I'm looking forward to that. Since she's already well-trained in obedience (Picture me looking proud), the purpose for the class is to get her (me) better trained in approaching other dogs. My trainer talked extensively about how visible it is that Jasmine is not interested in actually eating other dogs, she is just completely unskilled in her approach. She explained how we would improve that: mainly by building my confidence. She giggled as she pointed out that I was trying to talk myself into it, saying things like "I think this will be good." and "I think we can do this." My goal is lofty: to have people change their minds about Pit Bulls when they see mine. I'm already proud of the training I've done with her and how I have taken care of her, but I want that whole package. I've got some good dogs here. Maybe things will change and she will go live with either one of her true owners, but if I am not going to allow constant upheaval in her world- especially if I suspect she is just going to end up coming back to me.

I have not heard a lot about Ant. I see occasional pictures on Facebook, but most people in the family seem to feel like he will flourish once he sees that he is surrounded by family, love, and stability. The way things are right now, it seems like he is in the best place- down in L.A., living with his uncle's family. I could not have taken him- I don't have that local circle or an equally invested significant other, and it would mean constant interaction with Chris, which even I agree is not the best plan for me. Instead, I can take care of Jasmine. She may be Ant's dog, but his current family unit has their hands full, as does Topaz. There are a lot of things in Ant's world that have not been ideal, but it's poised to get better for him. In the meantime, if there's one thing he knows he can count on, it's that Jasmine will be well taken care of with me.