I went back on a dating app. Dating makes me miss my Night Bus so much. Everything does, but dating especially because it emphasizes just how brilliant, funny, interesting, and handsome he is/was and it jerks me between being mad as hell and sad as hell. It makes me think I will never find anyone close to as amazing as him- someone who really saw me, accepted me, challenged me, and loved me fiercely. This is such a bullshit outcome and I know none of you want to hear about it, but I'm still struggling hard with my loss.
And dating sucks- even with the knowledge that most people aren't right for you and that's fine. They're right for someone- even the guy who said his hobby is watching porn and the woman for him should have the same interests like watching porn. They aren't all that uh... honest. Many seem sane and even friendly. It's a roller coaster ride of enthusiasm.
After three visits, the maintenance people still hadn't fixed my toilet, which was only swirling around helplessly every other flush. My downstairs neighbors must think I have major digestive issues. I told my favorite neighbor during our weekly walk and she informed me that she would fix my toilet, and did. She listened to my description of the problem, watched the mechanism, kept track of whether we were on a working flush or non-working flush turn, diagnosed the problem, adjusted the components and fixed the dang toilet. I was so impressed, especially because I was watching all of this and didn't understand which thing did what. Amazing.
She was disappointed in our maintenance crew, and when I confessed i had no idea how she'd figured out the problem even after watching, she pointed out that yeah, but you're not paid to fix it. They are. That sent us on a tangential conversation about strengths vs experience as they relate to career paths.
I have been evicting a LOT of baby spiders. They are all the same size and variety, so somebody had a bunch of spider babies in here. I'm glad to learn that I'm not as horrified by this as I would have expected. It's been a vision test as they descend from unexpected places. Was that speck in a closer visual field than my brain first identified?
Next week is full, and not just because I like to spread out my birthday. I present the first of a new training and wrap up two long term classes. Plus 6 other things. I think I'll be working this weekend to prepare. That's the danger of working from home, but I'll feel better if I've got some of the prep work done.
This week I watched A Goofy Movie, which I enjoyed a lot more than I expected. It's very dated, but good, and I have the same review for the music. I started watching Last Dance on Netflix, and I can't recommend that enough. It's so good, even though I understand very little about basketball. This week I can't stop listening to When Am I Gonna Lose You, by Local Natives, and I'm also leaving my car radio on 97.7 KWNK.
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