Not so far.
Today I got asked, “Do you have cords?”
“Cords?”
“For the switchboard.”
So… twenty minute lunchtime blog. Can she do it?
Yesterday, Bubba was over hanging out with Ant and Chris was working. I had already wasted a lot of breath asking Ant to do the same three things over and over and I was not amused. I talked to Mom at some point that afternoon when my last nerve was frayed and I snarled about children while cleaning out the Dodge. I had just told the boys to go eat lunch because they never think about it until 4 and then they want to eat burritos. So they go into the kitchen and Ant asks if we finally have bread.
Yes, the bread that I made.
“Does it taste like real bread?”
Remembering my 13-year-old self and hell, my 23-year-old self, I could find this question perfectly reasonable. However, my 33-year-old self just invested lots of hours and love into that bread. I resisted telling him he didn’t DESERVE my bread and just asked him to try it and find out.
“Yeah, no.” he announced.
Then the two of them made sandwiches with pointed commentary about how they HAD to eat sandwiches and how DIFFICULT it was to slice and how IMPOSSIBLE it was to spread peanut butter on it. I am silently snorting like a bull in the living room, pawing the floor.
So Mom and I talk right after that and in the middle of the conversation, Ant comes out to ask me if Bubba can spend the night again. I already said no earlier, and I’m on the phone, but he tries to debate with me anyway. Shortly after that, Mom and I got off the phone and I went in to explain to the boys that tonight wouldn’t work, but we’d look into options before Ant left for Grandpa’s. They continued to push for THAT night. Then I walk into the kitchen and see the hamper is still sitting outside and not clean as I had asked for twice earlier. So I ask Ant why it’s not done.
“I’ll do it later.”
Well, you’ll have lots of time, because you’re grounded.
“WHAT!?!?!” And then he pouts for about half an hour while I walk around the house and try to collect my marbles.
Mom and I had been talking about feeling trapped in the house because Chris and I are keeping pretty opposite schedules. It is difficult to have to go to work while everyone else sleeps, even if Chris is working hard during different hours. Besides that, there are so many things I feel I have to do simply because nobody else will volunteer. Mom suggested that I get out or come home late some days and go get groceries or go to an art museum or something to spend some time alone or with a friend. I am seriously looking forward to my month off while Ant is gone just for the space and quiet to not have to tend to anyone’s needs but my own. I do need that- even when he’s home, but something else occurred to me about dealing with Ant: He needs to feel like I depend on him.
Look at Mother’s Day- I explained to him that I was going to spend 8 hours trying to meditate and release stress, and I didn’t want to come home and re-stress. He spent all day cleaning the house with no help from Chris. It changed his whole outlook to be responsible for something other than taking out the trash.
I decided that one night a week he will be responsible for making dinner. I should probably come up with more stuff like this and please- somebody remind me about this when he comes back home. So Jennyway, he was still pouting a little when we dropped Bubba off and were driving to the store. I told him the plan and he was still giving me one-word answers, but said he wanted to make tacos. At Wal-Mart, he volunteered to stand in line for me at the returns line, but I told him he could go pick out what we needed. He brought back tomatoes and lettuce and went on a mission for not too many tortillas at a decent price that were larger than taco size. We got ground turkey and cheddar cheese and discussed how to make tacos. He asked me to do nothing but supervise.
At home, he put the meat on and asked if I could cut the tomatoes. I reminded him I was supposed to stay out of the kitchen, but volunteered to grate the cheese. He had this lovely air of urgency about him, worried about getting everything ready in time. He asked what he should season the meat with and I told him to smell the herbs and spices. He thought rosemary smelled nice and I asked him to think about what would go well with the meat. He picked oregano. We talked about slicing tomatoes and how easy it was to slice fingers instead. He was incredulous until he almost did it. I told him how to break up the big pieces of meat and why you should tear lettuce instead of chopping it. I did take over the tomatoes so he could finish the lettuce and break out the tortillas.
He got two plates from the cupboard and found dishwasher residue on one.
“There’s no way we’re using THAT,” he announced.
Ha ha ha. Welcome to my world.
Ant whipped up some pudding while I set up the movie. We watched Hop and ate wonderful, tasty tacos, then some sugar free butterscotch pudding. After the movie, I washed dishes while Ant put the food away and wiped down the counters.
“Does this count as my meal for the week?” he asked.
“Yup.”
He’s quiet for a moment, then says,
“But tomorrow starts a new week, right?”
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